Hungover at work? Eleven tips for dealing with the pain
We’ve all been there. A couple of ‘thirsty Thursday’ drinks somehow turned into Karaoke and the next thing you know you’re rapping Eminem’s Lose Yourself at 1am and chasing it with another round of tequilas. Whose clever idea was this?
Cut to: Friday morning. Your alarm goes off at 7am, which feels like about 5 minutes after you went to bed (and it probably is). You look at the clock and tell yourself the first lie of the day, that you’re not hungover, you’re just thirsty. Fast forward to 10am and you’re at your desk, staring down the barrel of at least seven more nausea-filled, head-pounding hours. How in the name of Jaegerbomb can you possibly survive?
You can. If you’ve got the know-how. I present, the sum total of more frightful Fridays than I care to remember, are my eleven essental tips for surviving the work-based hangover.
- Hydration is key. Electrolytes can be a life saver so grab a Lucozade to get you through the morning (just don’t look at how much sugar is in there), then continue to mainline water like it’s going out of style.
- Try to look presentable. Have a shower, or at least dry shampoo your hair, and rather than succumbing to your the slobbiest outfit you can get away with put on something snazzy. It will make you look (if not feel) fit for public viewing.
- Coffee is necessary, so hit Starbucks or Nero on the way into work, but don’t go overboard or you’ll end up with heart palpitations.
- Breakfast is important, even if it’s just toast, and even if you feel sick try to get something down you.
- Master the art of looking busy when you’re actually watching videos on YouTube of swimming with retrievers. Keep your fingers hovered over the alt + tab keys so that you can quickly swap back to an important-looking spreadsheet when your boss walks past.
- DO NOT DRAW ATTENTION TO YOUR HANGOVER. If you weren’t out with work colleagues the night before you may come across as unprofessional. Or more likely they will be mean to you, make you do annoying things, never let you live it down and generally add to your woes.
- Biscuits, chocolate, donuts, ice cream – pick your favourite sugar-laden treat and eat without regret, you poor hungover lamb.
- Alleviate your nutritional guilt by loading up on fruit and veg, be they in whole, salad or smoothie form. Embrace the bounty and thirst quenching powers of cucumbers, watermelons, apple juice and the humble satsuma.
- CARBS are your friend today. It is a scientifically proven fact (or something) that they will help soak up white wine.
- Do not let other people’s un–hungover state get you down. It may be hard, but you must refrain from punching people on the train, on the tube, at work or in a shop. Even the man who is making your Egg McMuffin INCREDIBLY SLOWLY.
- Hair of the dog can work. There is some actual science behind this. The electrolytes in alcohol are supposed to help break down metabolites, the pesky things that give you the hangover in the first place. In small doses, though. One beer will take the edge off – six pints will Saturday horrific as well.
If you can mange this you can manage anything – GOOD LUCK and happy hanging.